Confidence

June 05, 2022
Thoughts

This is from the Notes by Clark series that you can subscribe to via email here: Subscribe to Notes By Clark

I’ve always naturally regarded myself as introverted, but I’ve been thinking about my behaviour. Maybe I’m not?

When I was very young, I was pretty joyful: while many would have regarded me as a little weird, I would be talkative and, in a positive way, shameless.

As I got older, I became more and more isolated, shy, and introverted. At one point, I found it very hard to ask a classmate to borrow a pen. I started getting a ‘them against me mindset’, thinking that a target was behind my back all the time.

But when I entered a new environment at College in September last year, a lot of this tension had gone, and I was now able to communicate more freely; a lot of it was because I knew the situation around me.

I can now handle small talk with strangers, host open evenings and even knock on people’s doors at election time.

My problem is less about liking people because I love being around people, but it’s more about confidence and familiarity: knowing the situation around me and finding ways to adapt to it.

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